is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
