Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just want nice things and good sex
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Come on in and take your pants off
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