LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I intend to get homeless drunk
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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