I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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