She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
