I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
nutella sex= disaster
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Randomize
