We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
