you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize