I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize