I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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