hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
