You're so nebulous sometimes
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize