I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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