I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Terrible idea I love it
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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