i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
