Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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