I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
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It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
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We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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