Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Even the bartender felt bad for me
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize