you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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