fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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