How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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