At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
