Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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