a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
