YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
