I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
do nipples grow back?
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