Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Are you dead

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  Yes

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Oh man

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard

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  (260): Are you dead (1-260): Yes (260): Oh man (1-260): Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard http://tfl.nu/iien
  Replies (7) Good night (3171) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store

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  (616): bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store http://tfl.nu/dcxn
  Replies (7) Good night (3419) Bad night (1330)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.

  (1-661): View more from California

  1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up

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  (661): 1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place. (1-661): 1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up http://tfl.nu/wu9m
  Replies (12) Good night (4502) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified

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  (603): More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified http://tfl.nu/si7g
  Replies (5) Good night (1568) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back

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  (585): She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back http://tfl.nu/7ssu
  Replies (2) Good night (1350) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.

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  (609): I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt. http://tfl.nu/9dqv
  Replies (10) Good night (743) Bad night (2264)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.

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  (210): We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do. http://tfl.nu/emf3
  Replies (6) Good night (1052) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.

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  (617): She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI. http://tfl.nu/ewv2
  Replies (6) Good night (1730) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.

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  (404): So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care. http://tfl.nu/6j38
  Replies (16) Good night (1077) Bad night (1853)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.

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  (240): Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone. http://tfl.nu/49no
  Replies (7) Good night (438) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina

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  (772): He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina http://tfl.nu/eog8
  Replies (14) Good night (1672) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?

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  (217): Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices? http://tfl.nu/ss4x
  Replies (0) Good night (741) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (819): View more from Quebec

  I feel awkward giving career advice while naked

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  (819): I feel awkward giving career advice while naked http://tfl.nu/b8zx
  Replies (2) Good night (517) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.

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  (812): She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever. http://tfl.nu/w90g
  Replies (2) Good night (921) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!

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  (775): He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!! http://tfl.nu/5zy7
  Replies (3) Good night (810) Bad night (222)

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