We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Plural? Please tell.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.