NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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