I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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