I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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