God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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