I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
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