Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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