Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
