Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I wish my penis had an off switch
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
