just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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