my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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