Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
