she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
