Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
