we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize