I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
