What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
