I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize