ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize