5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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