grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize