So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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