it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i think i have herpe
just one?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
