I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did